I melt in His peace, it's overwhelming...

this love is so deep....what a relief. I find refuge in my Lord my God. I was feeling so...I'm not really sure...kinda depressed, i guess. It was a 3 day weekend I pretty much did not do any homework, well not as much as I wanted to get done. I'm really disappointed in myself. i have to make a power point presentation and write 3 papers this week. I am so ready to be done with school, but I'm looking forward to my week long break...then its back to school for me, ick! oh well. one more year and then i graduate wooo hoo!!

As i was saying, i was feeling really sad for some reason and I could not focus on my homework. I began to surf the web and do anything to prevent myself from doing homework. I even went out and had some greasy food with a friend, i felt gross afterwards. Anyways, my mind was so foggy and i just continued to get lost in my thoughts, i even began to think how much easier it would be if Jesus would just come back right now LOL. Then i realized that I was not turning to God for comfort, i was trying to find it in all these little things that I thought made me happy, e.g. food, facebook (lol), etc. These things only made me feel worse.

I finally began to pray and even then i felt so lost and couldn't think straight. I felt like all these emotions were bottled up and I just wanted to let it out but didn't know how. I tried to pray and cry (because crying always makes me feel better). I tried to open up to God and I did somewhat, but not to the full extent. I prayed that God would help me to open my hear to Him and that's when I decided to play my guitar for a little bit. I played "The more I seek you" and as i sung the lyrics God really broke me and I burst into tears and began sobbing as I continued to play my guitar. The peace and relief that I felt was so amazing. I felt so light becaue, just like Jesus say, His yoke is easy.

AS I sung each word in the lyrics, i truly meant every bit. the more I seek God the more I find Him. I continue to experience His love and His grace everyday. The more I find Him, the more I love Him. That is so true, I am so in love with God that I want to pursue Him. His love surrounds me, it is something that can never be taken away, it is intangible and everlasting. Nothing can compare to it and nothing can replace it. Yes, I can attempt to seek out little hobbies that make me happy temporarily, but it won't last. You can get a temporary high from something, but God's love is something that's eternal, it is consistent even when i am not.

What a relief, I thank God that I have him as my outlet. I thank God that I do not need to find temporary relief in other things because I have his consistent love. It is something that will never change, i am secure with God, i am blessed with God, and I am at peace with God.

saaalssaa

hooray for salsa night. it was really fun as usual, except for the nasty creepers lurking around *shudder*. my friend celeste had to send one of her guy frineds to save me from a creeper LOL....now time for homework....oh yeesss, i've mastered the art of procrastination. i am the ultimate procrastinator. i have a presentation to do at 10 am it is now 4:05 am...i haven't started any of it, but i'm not worried lol. same o same o....i seriously need to stop procrastinating though cuz's its giving me some nasty dark circles under my eyes =(.....woo hoo 3 day weekend!! zzzzzzz, nooo can't sleep....presentation in a few hours =0 lol. .....i've been drinknig a lot of coffee lately, not good for my teeth.....

Running woo hoo!

I love running it is so refreshing. I ran a half marathon on sunday and I did a lot better than I expected, considering the amount of training that I did for it. After spring break (late April) I only ran about once a week with the most being 3 miles. That is not a lot of running since i was training for a half marathon. I still did pretty good i ran the enitre way. I wasn't expecting that. My overal time was 2:15!! woo hoo!! I don't really know if that's good, but still woo hoo, i finished and it felt soooo goood!! well, not really afterwards....my roomates and I were pretty much in pain.

The course was really nice. There were lots of trees. It was called Avenue of the Giants, a very relaxing run. I'm really excited to do another one. I really want to do a full marathon, but i need someone to be willing to come with me or at least do a half marathon. I'm thinkning i wanna do another one in september or sumthing. cool....i need to study for my midterm and i feel kinda disoriented. i'm sleepy....i'm excited to go running on friday morning =D